Take me home where I belong
Fandom: Yu-Gi-Oh! GX
Relationships: Manjoume Jun/Yuuki Juudai, Kanou Martin/Saotome Rei, Marufuji Ryou/Tenjouin Fubuki, Saiou Mizuchi/Tenjouin Asuka
Characters: Manjoume Jun, Yuuki Juudai, Tenjouin Asuka, Marufuji Shou, Manjoume Chosaku, Manjoume Shouji, Saotome Rei, Kanou Martin, Tenjouin Fubuki, Marufuji Ryou, Saiou Mizuchi, Misawa Daichi
Rating: T
Type: Chapter fic
Chapters: 32
Words: 43,668
Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, suicidal thoughts, implied/referenced homophobia, mental illness
Tags: attempted murder, angst, time skips, panic attacks, vomiting
Originally posted: 2020-02-23
Completed: 2021-02-02
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Killing time.
Chapter 6
They spent hours like that, curled up together on the bed, Juudai’s arms around Jun. At some point they had to get up to eat, and Asuka texted Juudai to let them know that her and their friends were meeting at her place at 5 this evening. It felt strange but reassuring to have her in charge. She’d come a long way since high school, and was now in charge of a lot of people at her own company that she ran with Ryo, so she knew how to run things smoothly, even if this was a brand new situation. Her presence, even if only through the phone, helped.
Juudai dragged Jun out of the apartment with the promise to treat him to a late lunch or early dinner. Or, as Juudai called it, dinch. It made Jun roll his eyes and tell him that it sounded like he was just trying to be sneaky about calling someone a bitch. It had Juudai cackling, Jun cracking a smile as Juudai held him by the hand until he was sure Jun wouldn’t ditch him.
He took him to a quiet ramen place, where only one other customer was as they got there. Jun rarely ate out, but he had passed by the little restaurant many times during his stay in the town.
Juudai showed him pictures of places he’d gone to and forgotten to upload to instagram, while Jun showed him his favourite pictures of Cheeseburger and random pictures he’d taken throughout the years. There weren’t a lot of them, since his phone was pretty shitty and didn’t have a lot of space, but it was enough to keep them occupied while they waited for their food.
While they ate, they kept catching each other glancing at one another, Jun pretending like nothing when Juudai grinned widely at him between bites. He told himself that the redness of his cheeks were due to the heat of the food, nothing else.
The conversation ran smoothly, talking about everything between heaven and earth. Juudai had to stop himself a few times to make sure he didn’t use Jun’s real name while they were out, but other than that there weren’t any real hiccups.
By the time they were done, there was about an hour and a half left till Asuka was meeting up with the others, and Jun was getting jittery. Was it a surprise that he was questioning the decision he’d made to get everyone involved? Of course not. He was getting more and more stressed out the more time passed, and while eating and talking about things that weren’t serious had been great to keep his mind off things for a while, it was coming back with a vengeance now. Juudai seemed to notice, and with a smile on his face, said that they should go see a movie. Jun questioned it, but it was a decent suggestion, really. He hadn’t been to see a movie in years at this point.
By the time they got into their seats the thought hit him that this felt a lot like a date. It wasn’t one, but once upon a time he had crushed on Juudai, but so had practically everyone else at school, and if he’d been ten years younger he would have exploded with how fast the blood would have gone to his face. As it was now, he felt his cheeks grow hot, but it seemed to slip past Juudai’s notice. They weren’t even holding hands on the way there, get over it. He wasn’t 16 anymore, what the fuck, feelings, stop remembering things that had made the brunette go from just an annoyance to someone he had sickly sweet dreams about at night.
It was just his loneliness talking, he reminded himself. Juudai was the first person in many years that he’d been reunited with, and so what if he was really good at comforting people and telling them exactly what they needed in a stressful situation these days. And things had been really stressful today, and it wouldn’t get any easier any time soon.
The movie was a dumb romantic comedy that didn’t take much energy to watch but was engaging enough to make him forget his problems for 90 minutes. Jun had never told anyone due to the mockery from his brothers, but he really loved movies like these. They were cheesy and fluffy and the drama was rarely as high stakes as the movie thought it was, and it was extra good if the movie took itself seriously while being ridiculous.
Juudai, ever the heathen, had taken his shoes off and gotten comfortable in the seat next to him, encouraging Jun to do the same. Of course, Jun had some semblance of manners (sometimes) and decidedly didn’t, but only complained about Juudai’s lack of manners mildly, making Juudai guffaw and the lady behind them to tell them to shut up when the ads ended.
They walked back to the apartment when the movie ended, a text arriving almost at the same time they got to greet Cheeseburger, Asuka telling them that the others were arriving soon and that she’d keep them updated on how it went. To distract himself for as long as possible, Jun decided to start preparing tomorrow’s lunch. It was going to be another early shift, and Juudai let Asuka know that Jun had to get up at 5 so if her talk runs long, text rather than call. He’d put his sound on vibrate once they went to bed.
After that was done, Jun was at a loss. He sat down next to Juudai on the couch, who was sitting with a happily purring cat on his chest, legs dangling over the edge of the couch while reading a book he’d picked off Jun’s bookshelf after the raven had told him to leave him alone in the kitchen. He’d just… needed some time alone. He’d been relieved when Juudai had given him the space he needed.
Jun stared up at the ceiling. Maybe he should clean it, it was pretty dirty. Then again, he’d tried that when he moved in, and no matter how hard he’d tried it wouldn’t come out. The white was permanently stained and the only way to get it clean was to paint it again. And he was not going to spend his money on something that stupid. When he was younger he would’ve just paid someone to do it for him, but those days were long gone now. If he was honest with himself, he didn’t exactly miss that part of his previous life. He’d spent money to fill a hole in his heart that material goods could never really fill. He did miss not having to worry about food though.
He let out a sigh that could be felt all the way through his head to his toes, and slid further down his seat. Juudai didn’t say anything, but he felt the shift of his head against his thigh. Absently, he ran his fingers through the brunette’s hair, as big and poofy as it had been in high school. At least some things stayed the same.
Juudai shifted, putting the book down as Jun brushed through the knots in his hair. A few minutes were spent like that, until Juudai’s phone pinged with a message, predictably from Asuka. Surprisingly enough it wasn’t a question, but her telling Juudai to give Jun her brother’s number, and call him when he was ready. After telling her that it’d already been done, Jun stood up, and while he could feel Juudai and Cheeseburger both watching him, he ignored them, heading straight to the bed. He curled up underneath the blankets, staring at his phone screen, back to where he had been not that many hours ago, before anyone but Juudai knew about his situation.
He should call Fubuki. But even though it was barely seven at night, he was mentally exhausted, and had no clue what he would even say. Would the older man be mad? Probably not at him, now that he knew what was going on and why he’d been out of contact with them for so long, but… what would he do? The man had been one of the more emotional out of his friends, even though he was extremely smart academically. Emotions like Fubuki’s would probably make him spiral when he was feeling like this, and then he’d be an utter mess in the morning.
He felt the bed dip, and given that it was too much to be his cat, he knew it was Juudai.
“You don’t have to call him tonight, I’m sure he’ll understand.” The sound was muffled but carried enough through the thick blankets he’d collected over the years. He moved around til his head popped out of them, looking tiredly at his friend.
“I know that already. I just… ugh.” He didn’t even know how to explain it to Juudai at the moment, but the other just smiled at him.
“I cleaned Cheeseburger’s litter box, you can go to sleep if you want.” Jun nodded slowly, hesitating as Juudai got up to go back to the couch to sleep there tonight, just like the night before.
“Wait--” Juudai stopped, looking over at him. “You can… sleep in here if you want. The bed’s big enough.”
The smile he got in reply was the softest smile he’d ever seen on Juudai’s face. “Okay.”
Notes
I couldn't decide on a song, oops. Also, off topic but on my brain right now; train your dogs, I got some major scratches while my cat Kalma and I were out on our daily walk because a dog tried to go after him.